He's really not a car person. It's expensive and it looks good, and that's all he cares about. He doesn't even know what half the settings and buttons do, and while we were cleaning it, I found a set of keys wedged in the depths of the passenger seat: 3 or 4 keys, fob for the office alarm, and a USB stick. Now this USB stick looked a bit scuffed up and tacky, but turns out it's a £5k Dunhill special edition USB stick that's covered in black diamonds. The guy's response on Dal saying I found it? "Oh, I wondered where that had gone."

More money than sense...