Also not really a quote but the funniest thing I've ever seen at work;

this guy was walking across the front of the stage holding 3 full pints- everyone in the venue could see him (about 2,000 people) and he suddenly lost his footing and fell, tipping all of the drinks over and absolutely drenching this girl in the front row
We were playing a show at the time and I nearly had to stop drumming I was laughing so hard. And to make it worse it was like one of those times at school when you know you really shouldn't be laughing because everyone is watching me on stage and knows exactly what I was laughing at

Still makes me laugh out loud to this day